Communication Skills Are Defining Your World

Communication Means Sharing

Most of us, if not all, know HOW important communication skills are. By being a master communicator you can increase your sales, build a winning team, or even save your marriage if you really want to! Yet not many people know WHY communication is so important. Let's have a closer look.

Why do people talk?

Have you ever asked yourself this question? What makes you fire up millions of neurons to piece together words into sentences and coordinate your mouth muscles along with flowing air to make a sound that actually makes sense?  There can be billions of answers but it all boils down to one specific reason: we simply want to share.

We like to talk about ourselves, no doubt about that. You don’t really need science to realise that; if you are observant enough you would know by now. The perceptual self, the ego, likes to expand and one of the means it does is through communication. Because the ego is an idea, and ideas grow by sharing.

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Everything you communicate grows

Communication is an exchange of facts and ideas and whenever you tell someone they don’t know you still get to keep your part. Therefore, communication is really sharing and multiplying.

I strongly suggest you take a moment or two and think about the quality of information you share the most1. Think about them in terms of facts, ideas and emotions, and make a list of three for each of category. Do it now.

Do you share courage or fear? Love or hate? Pleasantness or unpleasantness? The choice is always yours and you need to remain vigilant as what you share grows. And there is more.

You get better at it

you learn what you practice

Whatever you do at any given time you reinforce it, thus, you get better at it. We can say that you are constantly becoming a master of your most favourable style of communication. That is why I know that how you say it is far more important than what you say. And I’ll be more than happy to explain why.

When I cook together with my lady, which doesn’t happen too often though, we like to have a good time. So we make a little joke about ourselves, poking each other intellectually. Last time when I ‘lost’, I said to her ‘I hate you’ while giggling in hopeless surrender. Surely, it was an expression of love.

In comparison, the good custom is to say good morning when you greet someone at the start of the day. But the way some people say it clearly states they do not wish a ‘good’ morning at all. It’s rather closer to move along, next, you again and so on.

Communication: the bottom line

Whatever the value you are bringing to this world by sharing makes a statement about your communication skills. They clearly affect the way you operate and the way your environment responds.

Simply remember that everything that is manifested in this world had to happen in a human mind first. This realisation can be a beginning of a beautiful adventure.


Decide what, is it that you want and how do you want to share it with the world. If you are unclear, download my guide – 21 Days to Clarity – to bring yourself closer to the answer. 

Martin May

Managing Director at Intelligent and Lazy Management Consulting. Coach, trainer, blogger. "How we say it is more important than what we say"

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